Agnes
I am always waiting for that moment to happen.
It is uncertain when that moment will come, but I will know when it does.
Some say it’s an inspiration, enlightenment, awakening, or a miracle. We try and analyze it, classify it and comprehend it in terms of art, spirituality, and aesthetics, but simply put, it is ineffable. Only I will know when that moment happens and take notice. There are no words to express this deeper level of intuition.
I feel a breeze - it's like a light whistle sound. It glances off the white, bare rock in the valley, breezes through the bushy fir trees and blows across the fresh green leaves. The sky is ever so clear.
The diverse colors breath through dry air. The white melting snow has a bluish tint. The petal of a small yellow desert sunflower is almost in full bloom. The cathedral in scarlet colored earth resembles a crouched saint. The greenish Yucca quietly lingers in the blast whirlwind.
The sound of the wind and the color of the land translates gradually without fail, to the tip of my paintbrush in my hand.
Oftentimes, I am asked, "What are you painting? Do you get lonely painting alone?"
I would say, "I paint in pursuit of happiness. Happiness exists in beauty in perfection. Chasing beauty does not need a companion.”
"Is that why you are by yourself?"
"Yes, because I need to."
"Are you lonely?"
"Yes, probably I am, but loneliness fills the void and sharpens my senses.
That is why I continue to paint, to turn my solitude into strength.”
Atelier falls completely silent. I hang the square canvas on the white wall.
I sit down on an antique wooden chair and close my eyes. I lend an ear, observe, and peruse the sound of the breeze, the colors that fill this earth, and the shapes that disappear in the distance.
When the time comes.
I know it is indescribable to express in words, but if I may call it, in a familiar language, I will probably and irresistibly call this transcendent intuition, happiness.